do you ever hang out w/ someone and realize it’s not what you wanted to do and then you’re trapped for a few hours
2014 so far
January: Selfie Olympics
February: Flappy Bird
lets see how the rest of the year goes
March: No Oscar for Leonardo DeCaprio
April: it’s a metaphors, you’re a metaphors, we are a metaphor, if I see another metaphor I’m going to kill someone
Wonder how July is gonna be
i will keep reblogging this each month
I hope we all find that person
who looks at us
the way Kristen Bell
looks at sloths.
remember when the internet immortalized the picture of the couple kissing in the vancouver riots?
forget white people kissing in inappropriate places the only picture that belongs in the louvre is the picture of the man in the american flag shirt hurling a tear gas canister back while holding a chip bag in his other hand.
parents when they can’t get a hold of you: “i called TWICE AND YOU DIDN’T PICK UP”
me when i can’t get a hold of my parents: “I BROKE MY LEG. I CALLED UR CELL 11 TIMES, UR WORK PHONE 7 TIMES, AND SENT YOU 23 TEXTS, AND NO RESPONSE”
my parents: “wow sorry i was busy”
the idea of being right-handed or left-handed is so fucked up. like how in the hell is it evolutionarily advantageous to have one hand that’s good at everything and one that’s fucking useless. why aren’t we all dead.